Recognizing Valentine’s Day Depression

With the Olympics, we often hear the stories of success and triumph. There is little attention to those who trained hard for four years and did not make the team or came home empty handed. As a licensed social worker, I see a similar aspect in regards to the holiday of love… Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day is often a time where people feel special because they are treated extra special by those that love them. We hear stories of declarations of love and affection. However, during this time many students would come to my office feeling anything but loved and happy. Depression can arise during this time, due to a break-up, feeling un-popular amongst peers, and an array of other reasons that can bring on feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and emotional pain. As parents, teachers, and friends what can be done to be aware of depression around this time?

According to the nonprofit website Kids Health, there are several signs to look for if you feel that an individual may be depressed.

Negative Mood and Thoughts. 

We all have our moments where we are not in the best mood; however, we tend to bounce back soon and continue our typical activities. Depression involves an individual feeling sad, discouraged, and hopeless for weeks or more. You may hear a depressed individual speak negatively about themselves, saying comments such as 'No one loves me.' This is a possible sign of depression.

Physically Sluggish. 

Depression can cause physical symptoms, such as fatigue, loss of appetite, weight gain, headaches, or sleep problems. People often ask, how can they tell if a person is depressed when the physical symptoms can vary. The best answer is to try to notice any changes in the typical behavior of the individual. If they normally eat a lot and are barely touching their food, that is a warning sign. If they used to be involved in sports but no longer feel like participating, that can be a red flag. Depressive symptoms tend to be a shift from the normal behavior of the person.

Social Withdraw. 

Around Valentine's Day, there tends to be school dances and parties. If an individual who is usually social is now withdrawing and does not want to be around others, it can be a concern. Again, changes in behavior are a critical sign to look at when there is a concern about depression.

What can be done?

Many times, teens who are depressed are holding a lot of emotions in. Sometimes, acknowledging that you notice a change in their behavior and are concerned can help a teen to open up. Act as a support system and validate that they feel the way they do. If a person tells you that they are sad because their significant other broke up with them before Valentine's Day, do not tell them that they should not feel sad. Validate that they do feel sad and that is alright to feel that way, but work with them on moving past that sadness and to find healthy outlets to get rid of that sadness.

If you find that the depression is not improving in time or that the individual is speaking of potentially harmful behavior, it is time to bring it to the immediate attention of a professional counselor.